Advances In The Faith

Its been eight months since I came back home & it feels a lot better than I’d expect. Praying how I want, not feeling guilty for what I believe, reading the books I want without issue, saying prayers that I made or got from fellow practitioners. Being an adult Pagan is a lot different than when I was a child in that not only do I have a  lot more freedom, but more expenses. Adulting in general is a stressful thing. Worrying about bills, work, family, shopping alongside working on your faith is a lot for any one person.

Despite it I find myself looking in the mirror in displeasure of how I’ve been balancing life and faith, giving more to the former than the later. I experienced a similar unbalance when I first converted as a child, though I had more excitement as I had a lot more time, but a lot less freedom. Changes must be made.

The largest issue with practicing is this being the first time I haven’t had an established ritual space. For the longest I had an outdoor space that was dedicated and cleansed back in my early years. Now I have nothing and haven’t made the time to go searching due to my area always being a mistake away from bursting into flames. Or maybe that’s what I tell myself. My inflexibility will be the death of my faith as I cannot have things now be as they were years ago. The same setup, the same woods, everything. So what’s the game plan?

  1. Get back into writing– Weird right? Not do more rituals or read more books? Writing? Well yeah, writing, because that was always my hardest task. I call it writing in script, which is basically hidden language for when my writings are discovered. It was more of a necessity when I had my books and writings hidden outside, but I still believe in its importance with their still being a threat of prying eyes. Whether its family or friends, I don’t believe in being an open book. Not everything needs to be out in the sun. Writing is important because I struggled with consistency and therefore memorizing the characters, so when I didn’t have my reference I struggled a lot. So its a good way to prove my conviction to myself.
  2. Reading– Goes without saying. More reading equals more knowledge, so I need to READ! My focus is what I need to harden my spirituality and rebuild its foundation. What do I believe? How are the Gods organized? Why do I believe what I do? This and many more questions need to be asked and answered to give myself a more solid footing.
  3. Rituals– A path without the Gods is not a path worth walking. Rituals strengthen my faith and are conversations to have with them. Nothing intricate as needed as simple prayers to an altar will do.

Saying “I’ll do it tomorrow” is a sick disease of lameness where the can is kicked down the road into oblivion, let’s do something today!